Loneliness

"Loneliness is the poverty of self; solitude is the richness of self"
Well folks im back again not out of choice but for the want of anything better to do.After my previous two blogs this topic seems philosophical, but what to do? No classes, roommates out for long periods and nothing to do and nobody to talk to for long periods brings me to this seemingly innane topic.Loneliness is a feeling of isolation and being cut off and alienated from other people.But it should not be equated with being alone which is essentially a conscious choice and is pleasurable, positive and stimulating if it is done in the right amount.But the damn problem is that i feel lonely and its a forced decision upon me(or is it?).Inspite of being surrounded by my friends , inspite of pursuing all the activities in effort to something purposeful(a fancy name that a aimless wanderer like me absolutely abhors). Now many would say how can u feel lonely? I mean there are friends(besides the roommates), movies,laptop,outings, I mean who gets bored and lonely in a place like Mumbai?But that is not taking into account my confession that im a introvert-I cant fix up outings, I hate barging and tagging along friends who have prior commitments, and I cant meet up just for the sake of meeting up!So much so that i'm often accused of being snobbish n well...a guy who's not so well liked(he can't get along with us!! something's seriously wrong with the guy!! he's too full of himself, isn't he odd?I dont like something about this guy-I've been there and heard that!) Continuing the confessions I must also confess that I hate loneliness.Ah! now you'd say thats a contradiction, how can a self confessed introvert hate loneliness(its your flaw and fault!).but well...life's a series of contradictions.During these times I envy the extroverts, curse my own laziness of not making an effort to be with people and out of my self inflicted misery and loneliness, I also envy the hordes who have a purposeful life and the zeal to do anything which keeps them busy.My own days and nights are spent in a perpetual state of aimless haze..reminding me of my new strategy teacher n his preachings of vision, mission, goals and objectives. Fancy word these only I for the life of me cant inculcate and figure out my vision, mission, goal or objective. Maybe I should...to get me out of my pitiable state..Often I wonder that am I the only one feeling the pangs of loneliness or do people also live in the same state as me, as confused, as aimless and most importantly doing nothing about it? Moments like these also make me wonder that are introverts, people who are not popular enough like me and who lack the social graces of reaching out to people any way less than the extroverts and the class of people I mentioned above? Introvertness is considered snobbish and seriousness a behavorial disorder, Loneliness and its acceptance is seen as a sign of weakness, of a flaw within oneself..But again if I know im a introvert and I lack the social graces do I have the right to feel lonely(and also to crib and dedicate a entire blog space to it?).. I'm sure there are enough introverts out there who are happy and contented to be alone, doing their own thing, having something to look forward to and who are the voice of independence, peace and freedom(aren't these the virtues of being alone?)-but till how long?A purpose in life would not lessen the reality that you need company in your day to day activities.No hobby pursued alone can give you satisfaction beyond a point .Doesn't one feel the need to reach out to people?Individualism is great but only if peppered by human interactions. I guess man was named the social animal in deference to the initiated majority who are the extroverts.Even for the un-initiated few there are many things to do-pursue a hobby, read, play games(pc based n outdoor),watch movies, listen to music-there are innumerable things to do, so as to not commit the sin of feeling lonely.Sure I do all of these things, but cant carry it on alone beyond a point. I like listening to music-but whats the point if u cant appreciate it with someone.I even try to see a movie alone..but again grow restless..I swim but again how long can u continue swimming alone?I read-but i need someone to be able to discuss it with.All in all I do all the things a normal person does, but beyond a point the silence of the room starts bugging me, bothering me and driving me nuts.Now moving away from the twin theme of Introvertness vs. Extrovertness and the inability to pursue the acts of music, movies, games etc alone let me move to people who say-whats wrong in being lonely?We like the silence, the peace and the freedom to do your own thing, live as we want away from the mundane discussions, the boring talks and conversations held just for the sake of holding them.It helps us to think, to reflect and to meditate.People exist who are as happy to live alone. I often wonder in amazement at their ability which I sadly lack and would love to hear their point of view and what thinking goes into making them so, how do they cope up with the silence, the loneliness, dont they get bored going through their motions alone? Dont they miss human company while watching a movie,reading a book, listening to music.Do they go on outings alone?If so I would surely invite them over and like to have a chat with them but till then I curse my laziness, again envy the extroverts, the people having a purposeful life and again go back to my aimless, purposeless haze,wondering all the while that why dont i do anything about it and am I the only one who is like this?

Life:part1

life is said to be looked back and lived forward..or so goes the saying(in our terms gyaan)..well i can see many of my friends sniggering already but well friends i'm just gonna go a little back in time(read life) so bear with me..ummm so lets start from the time of our MBA..life from then to now has been a kaleidoscope of activity.Not so much as studies( i mean who remembers the times of studies!!) but of all the activities done besides that(aha!! so now we r talking sense huh!)..well in this journey i have had the company of some very intresting people..so this is a article about them and the time spent with them..The very first day of SIMSR was a day before the induction..i was pretty lost searching for souls like me when i met the IB gang n tarunesh..still remember the walk around ghatkopar and the movie at wadala(half the gang was for parineeta n half for Bunty n bubbly..i remember Tarunesh as the boisterous chatterbox(sorry buddy!)..with a damn cool n expensive looking mobile(which incidently is no more)..well the induction as such was not worth remembering(except the hideously blue coloured SIMSR bag n the handbook-for looking at the holidays)..The induction was spent looking franctically for a accomodation n settling in(n failing in many papers of the induction in quick succession) n frankly that is all i remember of the induction(accomodation accomodatin n accomodation)..in the process i met my roommate Sanchit and many friends who will find a mention in due time.. The 1st trimester started and so did my friendship with Abhishek..i remember abhishek as a typically geeky looking guy who couldnt hurt a fly(again reaffirming my belief that looks can be deceptive)..well i remember the movies i saw with him(remember standing every second day for the national anthem buddy?)..the bike rides(from procuring his bike from Bandra to the rides across juhu, worli, marine drive knowing nothing about mumbai, to mulund, powai n basically all of mumbai darshan)..how can i forget the wet ride across khar to get his i-pod. This whole time food was a big problem(which remains till date)..n the partner in my agony was my roomate Sanchit..with Sanchit comes to my mind the word Bindaas..a moody guy sometimes(dont hate me for this) but a good friend..oh yes he's a networker par excellence and quite modest at that but well i think so , so i write so!! the daru parties iv had with him(be the tequila shots to combing all(or nearly all) the bars of chembur have done all of it.Also spending 2 months paying a rent of 4250 Rs per person develops a special kind of bond..his late nights..the chicken rolls in chembur..infact staying with a guy 24*7 i can go on and on about him but all said n done a great guy, with a wicked sense of humuor and a jolly nature.(abhishek im realizing ur mind is straying but plz restrain urself!)...Some guys are cool and then some guys take this word to different levels n that is Rohan..a army brat or a disciplined child(take ur pic as the views about army kids vary)..he's a dude n truly a rockstar..well i think of him and i think of the trips to marine drives, trips for his laptop, the fags, and other unaccountable times we have been together(like sanchit its difficult to remeber each moment coz he's our virtual roommate)..a vocarious reader and a nazi at heart(again what we have in common though my zeal is nothing as compared to his)..his passions are WW2, nazism and well...burgers?(correct me if im wrong buddy!)we have had these innane talks on love to arranged marriages to i dont know what (well girls n...)and i truly appreciate his witty sense of humour(and i absolutely hate his teaming up with abhishek against me-howz that for honesty!).the one thing i associate with him is the times i spent reading the entire volume of harry potter(yes guys i did that n consider it my big achievement)..its surprising coz he actually dislikes them n it was sanchit which induced me into it but well its one of those things u know!!(sanchit is disclaiming this fact but well my blog my thoughts!)..ok so i mentioned the 4250 Rs rent sharing? along this time came prashant..my 2nd roommate..he is a master of one liners..and philosophical statements..a typical gyan guru..but a genuine guy and the best rommate one can have..i remember all the midnight tea and coffee he has made for me(or which iv forced him to make..shamelessly..) infact he's the kitchen incharge which gives him the right to all the tea coffee preprations, washing etc(cheers buddy!u r doing a great job and we are with u)..how can i forget the early morning jogs with him which came to an abrupt end(because we both compete on laziness and he's a sleepyhead(ok ok prashant im joking!)..all said and done these are the guys who have defined my 9 or so months in mumbai and have been with me through the good and bad times , through all the masti,gyaan n fun. well the post is getting too long and there are still people like Doctor, Lalit,my class room escapades, the fun presentations etc so this is my life:part 1..rest all will be covered in part 2..till then cheers!!

Goa Trip

There's something magical about Goa..its like God's own land-beautiful, unspoiled and enchanting. The place makes you fall in love with it and you are drawn in a love affair which stays with you lifelong and pulls you back again and again.So it was with great anticipation and enthusiasm that we seven bikers(we like to call ourself that) decided to undertake a trip to Goa. Fresh with the success of our Daman trip(which is approx 200 km from Mumbai) we geared up for Goa.Four bikes were made battle ready with carriers and all for conquering the 600 odd km between Mumbai and Goa, and so the adventure started.
We covered around 200 km between evening and midnight with many wrong turns and mis-communications, the chai , fags breaks, omellletes and the GHATS! Now ghats and the surrounding scenery look very beautiful in the daytime but in the night they look really intimidating, and with the heavy stream of vehicles from both the directions and the slopes going up and down it was not an easy task to cover ground in good time.Luckily I sat behind an excellent rider and that is my friend Abhishek(if you are reading this buddy i must give devil his due!!).So we stayed put for the night at a small town called Kheda in a guest house which had these beautiful mango trees and jungles extending behind it.The next day after a quick breakfast we started around 10:30 and covered one ghat after the other in good time(kudos to Lalit, Doctor and Manu!) .As i already mentioned the beauty of the western ghats is captivating and the greenery, the river twisting and turning with the road, the konkan trains moving along cutting through the mountains was a sight to behold.
We made it to Panjim at around 9 in the night covering some minor glitches faced by our very own Dr Vivek( glitches n Dr go hand in hand so i wont devote much space to that!!).The next morning we hit the Calangute beach and boy it was so cool!! The crowd was good, the beach spotlessly clean and the water inviting, infact me n Rohan made an instant pact to return there for a week after our placements then and there(remember it buddy?!)..After that we made a quick tour to Anjuna(where one of our more adventurous friend and my roommate Sanchit drove us on and on on the rocky outgrowths into the farthest point in the sea), then came Vagahtore and sunset on it.Anyone who's seen a sunset at a beach knows that its beauty is beyond description and for those who have not, please go for it!!Our dinner that day consisted of a American cuisine and why i mention this here is that the ambience, the personal touch, and the food was beyond compare and a lesson in hospitality to many Indian restraunts(Abhishek please dont snigger!). The night was spent sipping hot coffee on Calangute beach before dropping down like logs.
The next day was spent again in Calangute with Parasailing, jet skiing(yes guys yes we actually did that!!).. and getting tatoos done(i mean it was Goa right?!)...The night was spent cruising on river Mandovi..the music was sick (Himesh Reshamiya at his worst) but the cruise as such and Goa bathed in lights was amazing.
The final day we went to Fort Aguada, now the view and all was great again but somehow the heat plus the fact that most of us have seen forts of Rajasthan made most of us un-appreciative of the poor fort(i mean it was just a structure of walls!). The last item was the Candolim beach which is exclusively a foriegner's beach.By common consensus this was the best beach 'coz there was no crowd, only foreigners and the water and the waves were amazing(Rohan you missed out this one!) .The tanning we had on the trip was thanks to this beach. Lastly we had the most tasty lunch which was a Russian cuisine( and here a big thanks to Doctor for recomending it to us)..the food and the ambience was original Russian and the apple pie as the desert was heavenly(no dissents on this one)...The cuisines built deep holes in our pockets but let me assure you folks it was worth every penny. The trip back was as memorable for various reasons(wink wink!) and the trip itself will certainly be remembered by us for a long long time for the biking, the beaches the fun but mostly for the ambience and the feel of the place and also becoz I(and i would safely use the word WE) was in the company of such wonderful friends, it was their camaradrie which made the trip so wonderful ,enjoyble and fun filled. Guys hoping this love affair with Goa continues and we spend many such fun filled moments in Goa and many such destinations.Cheers!!!

first post

11th jan my first post